Stay-at-home moms now "trapped" by high fuel costs

[Atash Hagmahani]

http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/personal/08/11/stay.at.home.moms.economy.ap/index.html

Thousands of generations of women lived just fine without driving around everywhere.

When my kids were little, my wife followed along with her yuppie friends, and as a result, my kids never learned something as basic as being able to cross the street until they were WELL into their teens. It was jaw-dropping. They drove EVERYWHERE--a few blocks away and they'd get into the car.

Well that was partly because they didn't feel safe on foot on the streets. But also partially because she was mimicking the behaviors of her friends, who did almost everything outside of the home.

In the 1980s this city was full of all sorts of businesses catering to mother-child social groups.

Lady Lilya would be horrified. There were virtually no unstructured activities (such as are supposed to train the executive functions of the brain). Nobody was able to socialize, without participating in some sort of commercial activity!!!

The article is about a problem that isn't. These women should not be feeling "trapped", but instead should be organizing and visiting with the neighbors.

As for the economics of stay-at-home moms, well, in an inflationary, high-tax system, you want to produce as much value as you can yourself, and opt out as much as possible from the outer economy. They should be cooking instead of eating out, organizing their own recreation (playing games, inviting the neighbors over for tea), mending clothing to make it last as long as possible, doing things by hand rather than machine to reduce costs, etc.

[Kitteh]

This might be true, but before the time of cars, women lived in communities where they were surrounded by the rest of their family, and could walk to the amenities.

Frontierswomen might be the American ideal but it's a MUCH harder life than most women can cope with.  Why do you think so few women moved out INTO the frontier in the first place?  There were a LOT more men than women out there for a while.

Suburbia is a phenomenon that is simply not meant to be.  You don't know your neighbors because you don't have long-term roots in the community.  Your long term roots are with your friends and family who do NOT live within walking distance.   You have no incentive to make friends with your neighbors because your home is a starter home, and you have friends who are easily within reach.

Think of it like this: Family means that if you are sick you have someone else to watch the children while you recover.  Laundry, canning, and drying are easier done in large batches.  If a nursing mother's milk dries, another nursing mother in the family can take care of the baby until it can be weaned.  A living grandmother makes a child's survival that much more likely than a dead grandmother:
http://www.nature.com/nature/journal/v428/n6979/full/428128a.html

Because Women's Work is traditionally done in a group, we were given the blessing of ENJOYING socialization to the point where it is a need almost as sharp as food for women.  Telling a woman to get over it is just not going to make it go away.

I believe these Stay-At-Home moms are truly suffering and they'll continue to do so until they move to be closer to their families, or make ties with their current community.

[Lady Lilya]

Lady Lilya would be horrified. There were virtually no unstructured activities (such as are supposed to train the executive functions of the brain). Nobody was able to socialize, without participating in some sort of commercial activity!!!

It just seems obvious to me that children behave differently when in the presence of adults.  Instead of interacting with each other, they choose their behavior based on how the adults will react.  They learn very quickly how to get the attention or favor of the adults.  There is SOME value to this, since later in their life they will see adults trying to get the attention or favor of authority figures (imagine employees and a boss), so you would want your children to have some experience with interacting in an environment with an authority, but there are plenty of opportunities to do that.